


I Want To Feel You In My Veins

by megr0se



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band), 5SOS
Genre: M/M, acoustic singer ashton, band calum, fluffy as heck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-16
Updated: 2019-06-16
Packaged: 2020-05-13 02:45:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19242235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/megr0se/pseuds/megr0se
Summary: “So, is there any bands or artists out there at the minute that you guys are into?”From the corner of his eye, Calum sees Luke’s eyes brighten just before he speaks, “Well, Cal here likes—“Calum reaches over the desk to slap a hand over Luke’s mouth, “Shut up, dude!” he hisses.or5SOS are doing single promo on a radio show, where Calum's secret crush is exposed





	I Want To Feel You In My Veins

**Author's Note:**

  * For [FalseDevotion](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FalseDevotion/gifts).



> i'd love to dedicate this fic to Vicky (FalseDevotion) for being the sweetest gal ever, thank you for always giving me your kind words and encouragement, you're the best!
> 
> i hope we're all ready for some more soft fluff!  
> please let me know what you think in the comments, hope you enjoy xx

Calum leaves the stage to deafening screams and applause. He kisses his fingers and throws his love to the fans in the crowd, thanking them. He turns and grins at Luke, his bandmate, as he drapes an arm over his shoulder, leading him down the steps and towards their dressing room. He drops down onto the plush sofa, Michael falling down next to him, pressing his sweaty face into Calum’s neck.

“Fuck, that was a good show,” Michael mumbles into his skin. “I think my hearing is actually damaged, they were so loud! And I’m so fuckin’ sweaty, man.”

“Yeah, I can feel that, mate,” Calum says, resting his head atop his bandmate’s head. “You’re right, though, that was an incredible show, my ears are ringing already.”

Luke unceremoniously drops down onto the chair opposite the two, leaning over the table to grab a bottle of water. He takes a sip as he pushes his hair away from his forehead. 

“Honestly boys, I don't think we’ve played to a crowd that loud in ages! They must really be loving the new stuff,” Luke says, grinning as he sinks back into the cushions.

Calum grins back, listening to his friends talk excitedly, nodding at the right moments as he takes it all in. The band is in the middle of a tour and as well as releasing two new singles, they have constant promo and interviews, and honestly, Calum is exhausted. But seeing the joy on his best friends’ faces and hearing their words sung back to them makes it all worth it. 

“Cal, mate,” Luke says, bringing him out of his head. “Your phone,” he points to the table, where Calum’s phone sits, lit up. 

He leans forward, grimacing at the feeling of his sticky skin peeling away from Michael’s own as he reaches to check the notification. He ignores the disgruntled noise Michael releases as he leans back on him, swiping the screen and punching in his passcode. He drags down his alerts menu, skimming over the news app and a few tweets, halting when he sees a new post from Instagram. 

_[AshtonIrwin: posted a new photo]_

He feels his heart rate pick up involuntarily as he clicks on the notification, his fingers tapping against his knee as he waits for the post to load. 

The white screen before him forms into an image of a man, sat in front of a window, the sunlight hitting his tanned skin and his red hair, lighting him up. He is looking down at the guitar in his hands, his fingers wrapped delicately around the neck as he smiles a perfect smile. The heavy chain hanging from his neck glimmers in the light, shining a pattern on his bare chest. The caption reads, _“Day off at home. New stuff coming soon!”_

Calum’s thumb hovers over the like button, almost tapping it before he sighs and lets it fall back down. His head slumps down onto Michael’s chest, the vibrations under his head slowing down as Michael stops talking. 

“What’s up with you?” Luke asks, kicking Calum’s shin gently with his boot. 

Calum’s response is cut off by Michael, “He’s stalking Ashton again,” he says.

Calum huffs as he punches Michael’s shoulder, letting his own arm fall around him, resulting in more of a cuddle. “No I wasn’t,” he speak into his friend’s chest. 

“Mate, I’ve been sat behind you this whole time, I can’t believe you have his notifications turned on, you're in deeper than we thought,” he teases, ruffling Calum’s short hair.

Calum moans again, “Shut up,” he says, because he can’t deny it. “Did you see the photo though? You get it, right?” he whines. 

Luke laughs, “Yes, Calum, he’s very handsome. We just wish you’d actually talk to him, instead of pining from a distance.” 

“I don’t pine!” Calum says, face still buried in Michael’s shirt, his voice muffled. “He’s never even shown any interest in getting to know me, how could I just message him out of nowhere?”

He feels a gentle hand on the nape of his neck and opens his eyes to see Michael looking down at him. 

“Well, Cal, that’s how people get to know one another, mate, by talking to people they don’t know, you know?” Michael says, voice growing more mocking as he goes on. 

“Fuck off, mate,” Calum retaliates, his body bouncing as Michael laughs underneath him. “What would I even say?” 

Michael’s arm wraps around his waist, hugging him back. “Just the normal small talk. ‘Hey man, love the music! Keep it up!’ that kind of shit,” he says. 

Calum hums in agreement, wishing he actually had the guts to do that. His eyes close shut again, the soft vibrations of Michael’s voice lulling him to sleep. Images of tanned hands on guitar strings flood his mind. 

—*—

“That was _Easier,_ the new single by 5 Seconds of Summer! And the boys have joined us now, hey guys!” The interviewer, Jon, says, smiling as he introduces them to the radio audience. 

Calum adjusts the headphones on his ears and smiles back, “Hey man, thanks for having us,” he says, Michael and Luke voicing their thanks, too. 

“That song is a straight up banger, lads!” Jon says, “Such a cool new sound, where has that come from?” 

Michael starts to explain that they are becoming more comfortable in trying new styles when it comes to their music, and this new era has come naturally to them. Calum lets his bandmates take the lead, thankful for the relaxing style of the interview. 

That calm moment is ruined with the next question. 

“So, is there any bands or artists out there at the minute that you guys are into?”

From the corner of his eye, Calum sees Luke’s eyes brighten just before he speaks, “Well, Cal here likes—“ 

Calum reaches over the desk to slap a hand over Luke’s mouth, getting himself tangled in the wires in the process, leaving the boy laughing behind his fingers. Calum squeezes his other hand tighter on Luke’s arm, “Shut up, dude!” he hisses. 

Michael is roaring with laughter on his other side as the interviewer and other members of the radio team watch on confusedly. 

“Oh, you’ve got to tell us now, come on!” Jon says, joining in with the others despite not understanding the inside joke. 

Calum feels his face heat up, knowing that his blush will be showing up on the camera set up in the corner of the room, his hands fiddling with the wires on the desk. Knowing he can’t escape this, he mumbles out, “There’s a singer I like and the boys like to tease me about it.”

Luke puts a firm hand on Calum’s upper arm, “More like in love with, mate,” he says, causing Calum to put his head in his hands as the people around him laugh louder and throw questions his way. 

“It’s Ashton Irwin, you know that acoustic guy that’s blowing up right now? Cal loves him,” Michael says through his giggles. 

“Michael!” Calum cries, smacking the hat off his friend’s head. “What are you doing?!” Michael just shrugs as he fixes his hair, grinning smugly. 

Jon laughs again, “Oh thats precious! We met him recently actually, when he won the Newcomer award. He’s a lovely guy, he’s on our show next week, maybe we could put a good word in for you?” he suggests, wiggling his eyebrows in Calum’s direction. 

Calum finds himself laughing despite his blushing face, speaking through his hands, “Oh god, no, please don't say anything, let’s all forget this just happened.”

He sits in between the two traitors he calls his best friends as they laugh and pat him on the back. “We’re only messing, Cal,” Luke says, and his honest tone manages to calm Calum’s anxiety a little. “Now, back to the new single…” 

—*—

As expected Twitter is a mess after the interview. Calum’s mentions are non-stop with tweets from his fans, Ashton’s fans and random people wondering what ‘Cashton’ means. Calum had reluctantly clicked on the trending hashtag, spending more time than he would ever admit scrolling through the endless threads. He finds out that people really like the idea of him and Ashton being together. He reads paragraphs that go into great detail of what people would like to happen with them, he sees edited pictures of them together that make his heart ache in the best way possible. He’s equally terrified and full of hope as he scrolls, refreshing the tag every once in a while to see if any new tweets appear. 

He’s sat bundled in his softest green hoodie, his phone so close to his face that his eyes are almost crossed, when Michael lets himself into Calum’s hotel room. 

“Why don’t you just message him, mate?” Michael says, the most sincere he’s ever sounded when it comes to Ashton. “This might be the perfect opportunity to talk to him, I mean, this reaction is mental.”

Calum locks his phone and lets it fall down by his side, “I can’t, Mike, it’s already embarrassing enough, I don’t want to make myself look like a dick anymore than I have. He probably hates me by now, anyway,” he sighs, running a hand over his buzzed hair. 

Michael sighs in return, knowing not to push to topic, instead just sitting down next to Calum on the chair and opening his arms for his friend, who willingly cuddles into his side. “Wanna watch The Office?” he asks. 

Calum huffs out a laugh, “Obviously,” he says, reaching under his thigh for the TV remote. 

That night, Calum lays in bed, staring at his Twitter drafts. Countless unsent messages sit in the folder, things he wishes he could say to Ashton, but never will. He stares until his screen goes black. 

—*—

Calum is sat on the floor, bass in hand, at rehearsals. The band have a festival set coming up in a few weeks, a setlist that showcases their new material as well as their older stuff, but by now they all know these songs like the back of their hands. He strums along absentmindedly, Luke’s voice washing over him. He closes his eyes and lets himself get lost for a while, not realising he’s dozed off until he hears his name being called. 

“Cal, Cal, mate, wake up” Luke says, kicking his foot as he walks past. Calum just about catches his bass as it falls off his lap, propping it up against the amp to his left. “And please check your phone, it’s not stopped buzzing in ages and it’s pissing me off.” 

Calum rubs his eyes and reaches blindly for his phone, which vibrates in his hand when he picks it up. His eyebrows furrow as his eyes take a second to focus, which proves hard as his screen is full of notifications, growing more and more the longer he stares. “What?” he says, unlocking his phone and pulling up twitter. His eyebrows promptly fly up towards his hairline when he sees his timeline. Words like ‘cashton’ and ‘omg ashton!!!’ jump out at him, causing his hands to shake as he clicks on the tag once again. The tag is full of pictures and tweets that Calum struggles to make sense of, scrolling until he finds a post from the radio station the band were at last week. 

_‘Jon sits down with Ashton Irwin to talk about his upcoming album, his influences and the recent Twitter favourite: Cashton! Watch the full interview and performance here!’_

“Fucking hell,” Calum whispers, burning a hole into his phone screen as he stares at the tweet. “Guys, what the fuck is happening,” he says, loud enough to get Michael and Luke’s attention. 

“What’s up?” Michael asks. Calum just hands his phone over, shellshocked. 

Michael and Luke gather around the phone, smiles coming over their faces as they read the tweet. “Oh man, this is amazing,” Michael says, laughter in his voice. “Are you not going to watch it?” he asks.

“No,” Calum answers quickly. “I mean, yeah, but, I don’t know,” he trails off. 

Luke walks over to Calum, “Come on,” he says, holding both hands out for Calum to grab. “We can get it on the laptop and watch it together, mate.” 

Calum looks up at his friends, blinking a few times before taking ahold of Luke’s hands to get dragged to his feet. Luke keeps one hand in his as Michael types something into his laptop, setting it on the desk in front of their recording equipment and pushing Calum down on the chair. The video is paused on an image of a smiling Ashton, his hair is pushed off his face, aside from one curl falling into his eyes. He is wearing a red and black striped suit jacket, the same chain from his last Instagram hangs from his neck and his eyes seem to be shining. Calum swallows thickly and puts his hands in his lap, wringing his fingers together. 

“Ready, bro?” Luke says softly, placing a hand on his shoulder, him and Michael stood behind him. 

“Yeah,” Calum says, watching as Michael reaches over him to press play on the video. 

_“Hey! My name is Ashton Irwin, and this is my cover of one of my favourite songs, Vapor, by 5 Seconds of Summer,”_ Ashton says, smiling into the camera before wrapping his fingers around his guitar and playing a tune. He closes his eyes as if he is really feeling the melody, then he starts to sing. And Calum’s heart soars. 

His deep voice sings the song as if it is his own, he pours his soul into the performance, his green eyes opening again when he reaches the chorus. A smile stretches across his face as he sings the line _‘I want to feel your love like the weather, all over me,’_ and Calum can’t stop himself from mimicking the smile himself. Calum has never imagined the song in an acoustic style, but the way Ashton is singing it is enough to change his whole opinion of the song. So natural and heartbreakingly real at the same time, Calum thinks that this song was written for Ashton to sing. 

He begins the second verse and Calum’s heart thumps impossibly faster. He cannot help but think of singing this with Ashton, as a duet, imagining their voices blending together. On screen, Ashton is singing around a subtle smile, his eyes closing again as he feels the music. 

The song finishes too soon for Calum’s liking, Ashton smiling humbly as he receives applause and praise from the crew, placing his guitar down and pushing his hair off his face nervously. The video ends with Ashton saying a quiet thank you and Calum is left staring at the screen, speechless. He feels a hand squeeze his shoulder, and looks back to see Luke staring down at him.

“Okay, I think I get it now, he’s amazing,” he says with a smile, his eyes slightly misty.

Michael makes a noise of affirmation, “That was an amazing cover,” he says. “And this is better than anything I could've imagined, this is the best origin story you could ever wish for.”

Calum just laughs, not able to wipe the smile off his face if he tried. “I’m honestly speechless, that was,” he pauses, trying to find the right words. “That song was perfect for him, don’t you think?” He turns around in the chair, facing his friends. 

“Yeah, man, it was fuckin’ brilliant,” Michael says, a grin so wide it rivals Calum’s own. “So, when are you going to talk to him?” He asks, excitedly. 

The smile falls swiftly from Calum’s face, “What?” he says, voice quivering with nerves. 

Luke squeezes his shoulder again, “Cal, this is a good sign right? I mean, he obviously knows what was said on the show last week, there wasn't really a way he could have avoided it, and now he’s sung one of our songs. _He knows,_ Cal, and he still did this, this is a really good sign!” he says, smiling in reassurance. 

Calum nods, trying to let the past ten minutes sink in, “Yeah, it is a good sign isn't it?” he asks rhetorically, “I’ll message him, I mean, I kinda have to, don’t I?” 

Luke begins to say, “Well, you don't _have_ to —“ when Michael interrupts him.

“Yes! This is the perfect opportunity, Cal! You’ve been waiting for a perfect time, and it’s now!” Michael says, his voice encouraging. 

Calum is about to protest, say he categorically cannot do this when Luke says, “Wait, another video has been uploaded, Twitter is going wild again,” he’s tapping on Calum’s phone screen before he hands it over, Calum taking it in his hands quickly when he hears Ashton’s familiar laugh. 

The video shows Jon sat opposite Ashton, a sly smile on his face. 

_“So, we had a certain member from a certain band on our show last week, and he had some words to say about you,”_ he says, laughing when Ashton smiles and looks down at his hands bashfully. 

_“I think I know what you’re talking about, Twitter has been an interesting place these past few days,”_ Ashton replies, pushing his fingers through his hair nervously. 

_“I bet, do you have anything you would like to say, in case said band member is listening in?”_ Jon says, clearly trying to stir the pot. 

Ashton laughs and plays along, _“All I’ll say is I’m very flattered, and if this certain band member wanted to contact me I wouldn’t be opposed,”_ he says, grinning and shooting a look to the camera, as if he is talking directly to Calum. 

Calum doesn't hear the rest of the interview, too focused on the sound of Ashton’s voice ringing in his ears. Ashton saying he was flattered, saying he wouldn't mind if Calum was to get in touch. He’s knocked out of his thoughts when he feels excited punches on his back. 

“Calum! You heard the man! If you don't message him I’m going to do it for you, the whole world is rooting for you two at this point,” Michael cries dramatically. 

Calum just closes down the YouTube app, flicking back over to Twitter and searching for Ashton’s account. The page loads, his stomach fluttering at the ‘Follows You’ icon, he still remembers the day he got that notification. His thumb hovers over the message button, pressing down then staring at the flashing cursor, not knowing where to go from there. He chances a look at his band, both looking down at him with supportive smiles. Luke lifts his eyebrows as if to say “go on,” so he takes a deep breath, and he starts typing. 

_‘Hey, i hope it’s okay that i’m messaging you. i’m sure your twitter is just as crazy as mine right now! i honestly don’t know what to say, but if you would like to meet up or even just talk, i’d really like that :) Cal x’_

He clicks send before he can second guess himself then chucks his phone down onto the desk, his heart racing. His head tilts back between his shoulder blades as he releases his breath. 

Michael ruffles Calum’s hair gently, “I wouldn’t worry too much mate, I think something good will come of this,” he says. He moves his hand on the side of Calum’s face, pinching his cheek softly to get a smile out of him, he succeeds. 

“You did well, mate,” Luke says, “Come on, let’s run through some more songs before today is over.”

Calum nods, moving to stand up and pick his bass up, to find the familiarity he needs right now. 

Michael claps a few times, “Yeah, how about we do Vapor?” he says, looking to Calum for confirmation, trying hard to keep a straight face.

Calum is the first to crack, letting out a genuine laugh for the first time that day, pushing Michael away from him and towards his guitar, “Fuck off, mate.” 

—*— 

Calum tries his hardest to avoid checking his phone every few minutes over the next day, but he can’t help but wonder if Ashton has replied to his message. He ends up turning on airplane mode, the temptation getting too much. He goes on a jog with Duke, he Skypes with his family, he writes a verse to something that resembles an 80’s ballad, but the day still seems to drag. 

It’s not until he’s stood in his kitchen, cooking his dinner that he checks his phone once more. There’s a notification waiting for him, sent 47 minutes ago. He fumbles with his passcode as he rushes to read it. 

_‘Hey! Yeah I don’t think my notifications have stopped for about a week haha! I would love that :) You just tell me when you’re free and we can organise something, Ash xx’_

Calum reads and re-reads the message, memorising every word. His thumbs start to move of their own accord, not thinking twice about replying. He’s already wasted 49 minutes, he doesn't want to wait any longer. 

_I can make time whenever, are you still in LA? x’_

Calum sits at his kitchen island, his dinner long forgotten, as he waits impatiently for a message to come through, turning the silencer off incase Ashton replies. He taps out a familiar tune on the worktop, the sound echoing in the silent room. His phone vibrates against the cold tile, startling him. He dives on his phone, unlocking it and reading the message, the app already open and ready for him. 

_‘Yeah i’m here all week! You want to meet up before I leave? xx’_

Calum grins as he types out a reply. 

_‘definitely, whenever you want :) xx’_

—*—

Calum comes out of his bathroom, holding his arms out in the direction of Michael and Luke, who are both sprawled across his bed.

“Okay, how about this?” he asks, looking down at his outfit. He’s wearing a white t-shirt tucked into wide legged black trousers and platform Doc Martens, and he feels good. 

Luke just nods approvingly while Michael doesn't take his eyes off his phone, “Yeah mate, that’s the one,” Michael says.

Calum throws his hands up above his head, “You didn’t even look at me! This is useless, man, I’m not going,” he turns to retreat to the bathroom.

Luke smacks Michael’s phone out of his hands, “Cal, come on, you have to go! You look great, all these outfits have been great,” Luke says, grabbing Calum’s wrist and turning him back around. “You have the perfect opportunity for something amazing here and you’re not fucking it up because you’re scared. Now, put on that hot leather jacket and go.”

Calum laughs despite himself, nodding and taking a deep breath, walking over to his closet to find his jacket. 

—*—

Two hours later Calum is walking to his favourite cafe. He’d stumbled upon it a year or two ago, just out of the way enough that he doesn't get recognised much but close enough that it still emits the feel of Los Angeles. He’d suggested the place to Ashton over message, thinking it would be the perfect place for them to get to know each other, not telling him that he actually holds the place close to his heart. He jogs across the road and makes his way down a small side street, leading to the understated cafe. He stops in front of the glass door, peeking inside, seeing only two of the tables occupied. There’s an old couple sat at one of them, their hands joined on the centre of the table, and Ashton is sat at the other. 

Calum stands for a second, watching as Ashton passes his phone between his hands, looking around at his surroundings nervously. Calum feels a smile come across his face naturally as he steps closer to open the door, pushing against the glass as a bell rings above his head, alerting Ashton, who’s head snaps up in his direction. 

Their eyes meet and their smiles grow. Calum takes a few short steps towards Ashton, stopping in front of him, running a hand over his hair. “Ashton, hey,” he says, watching Ashton’s eyes brighten when he says his name.

Ashton stands up promptly, “Hi, Cal, it’s nice to see you,” he says, hesitating for a moment before holding his arms out, inviting Calum in for a hug, which he instantly accepts. Ashton’s arms wrap around his back, the leather of their jackets squeaking as Ashton squeezes softly, and Calum feels himself melt into the other man. 

He pulls back, his smile growing as he feels Ashton’s hand run down his arm slightly before it drops to his side. 

“It’s nice to see you, too,” Calum finally says. “I hope you haven't been waiting long, can I get you a drink?” he asks, seeing the table empty in front of Ashton. 

“Oh yeah, thanks, I’ll have an iced coffee, please,” Ashton says, smiling as he sits back down. “Thanks,” he says again.

Calum nods and grins one more time before he turns and walks over to the counter. He rests his elbows on the bar, glancing over his shoulder at Ashton. He’s taking off his jacket, revealing a red shirt covered in small black polka dots. His upper arms stretch tightly around the fabric as he moves to place his jacket over the back of his chair. Calum doesn't know how long he's been staring when someone says his name.

“Calum! Nice to see you here, love, it’s been a while.”

He whips his head towards the familiar voice, smiling when he finds Helen, the cafe’s owner. “Hey, Helen, yeah I’ve been super busy lately, it’s good to be back,” he says.

The wrinkles around Helen’s eyes deepen as she smiles back, “You know you're always welcome here, dear. What can I get you? Your usual?” she asks.

Calum feels his nerves dissipate at the familiarity. “Yeah, thanks, and an iced coffee, too, please.” 

Helen stops in her tracks, a porcelain cup in her hand, “Oh, do we have some company today?” she says, her eyebrows raised. 

Calum looks down at his hands on the bar, “Um, yeah, I’m here with Ashton, he’s sat over there,” he tilts his head in Ashton’s direction. He watches as Helen’s eyes travel over the cafe, seeing her expression change when she spots Ashton, her eyes turning mischievous. “Well, well, well, isn't he handsome! Where did you find him?” 

Calum shakes his head fondly, “It’s a long story,” he says, taking his wallet out of his pocket and removing a $10 note. 

Helen nods, smiling but not pushing the subject. “Well, get yourself back over to him, I’ll bring these over when they're ready,” she says, pointing to the cups. “And put that away, these are on the house. Don’t pull that face at me, go, sit down, I won’t be long,” she says, pushing at his arm gently. 

Calum shakes his head again, knowing better than to argue with the older woman. “Thanks, Helen,” he says, dropping the money in the tip jar when she turns her back. He makes his way over to Ashton, who is watching the two, an amused look on his face. 

“Friend of yours?” he asks as Calum pulls a chair out. 

Calum breathes out a laugh as he sits down, “Yeah, Helen is great. I’m pretty much a regular here at this point,” he says. 

“Oh nice, I get it, though, it’s really chill, calm,” Ashton says, his eyes flitting around the small room before meeting Calum’s gaze again. 

Calum nods, “Exactly, I spent a lot of time here last year, it’s a good place to sit and write,” he says, smiling when Ashton nods too. 

“I can imagine it is,” he says, looking over Calum’s shoulder, smiling. Calum hears gentle footsteps growing closer and a second later two drinks are placed between him and Ashton. 

“Here we are, boys,” Helen says, grinning at the two. “I hope you enjoy,” she smiles at Ashton as she places a hand on Calum’s shoulder. 

Ashton looks up at her, “Thank you so much, these look great,” he says genuinely.

Helen squeezes Calum’s shoulder, “You’re very welcome, dear. Now, I’ll leave you two to it,” she says, throwing a sly wink Calum’s way before he walks away. Calum has to bite down on the inside of his cheek to stop himself from smiling too wide. 

“She’s lovely,” Ashton says, taking a sip of his coffee and nodding in the direction of Helen. 

Calum laughs, “Yeah, she’s something,” he says, looking at Ashton from over his cup. “So, how has your LA trip been so far?” he asks, putting his coffee down before he moves to take his jacket off. 

Ashton’s eyes follow his movements, his gaze focused on Calum’s bare arms, “Um, yeah, good,” he stutters as he runs his finger around the rim of his glass. He clears his throat before he speaks again, “It’s been amazing, to be honest, better than I could've imagined,” he says. 

Calum drapes his jacket over his chair, hiding a smile in his shirt quickly before giving Ashton his attention. “Really? That’s great,” he says. “You’re doing amazing lately, man, you’re taking over the world,” he says, grinning when Ashton scoffs, his face turning pink. 

“I wouldn't go that far, I’ve just been lucky, I guess,” he says with a shrug. “Really lucky.”

“Don’t discredit yourself, you’ve done all of the hard work, and it’s paid off,” Calum says. “That’s all on you, just enjoy it.” 

Ashton is silent for a second, resting his head on his fist. “Thanks, Calum,” he says slowly. “That means a lot.”

Calum just shrugs it off, “Tell me all about it, I remember being so excited the first time I came here,” he says, clasping his hands together on the table and leaning forward.

Calum learns that Ashton’s eyes light up when he talks about music, and that he talks with his hands. He learns that Ashton plays piano as well as the guitar, but he doesn't think he’s any good at it. He learns that he started writing songs when he was younger and never stopped, and that his family is his biggest inspiration as well as being his biggest fans. But above all, Calum learns that Ashton has the best laugh he’s ever heard. 

Their drinks are long finished, neither of them bothered about leaving the table to get another. Calum feels comfortable, he feels like he’s known Ashton for a lot longer than today, that he could talk to him for a long time without getting bored. There’s a lull in their conversation, but it’s not awkward. Calum is content to let Ashton set the pace, so he waits for him to speak again. 

Ashton shuffles in his seat, crossing his arms over his chest as his face tries to fight a smile. “So, about that radio interview,” he says, his teeth shining when Calum’s eyes widen. 

Calum brings his hands up to cover his face, “God, I’m so sorry about that,” his voice muffled. “I didn’t know the interviewer was gonna ask that and I definitely didn’t know my band mates were gonna say anything. I was so fuckin’ embarrassed,” he peaks through a gap in his fingers, seeing Ashton laughing quietly, his shoulders moving.

“Don’t be embarrassed,” he says, laughter in his voice. “I mean, it brought us here didn’t it?” His voice grows a bit quieter, a bit more uncertain. “And I know I wouldn’t have ever had the courage to talk to you if I hadn’t seen the interview on Twitter,” he trails off. 

Calum drops his hands away from his face, landing on his thighs, “Really?” he asks.

Ashton smiles sheepishly, “Not at all, I’ve been a fan for a while and I never knew you’d even heard of me, never mind any of this,” he says. 

Calum shakes his head in disbelief before letting out a quiet laugh, “Yeah, I mean, the guys give me shit because I talk about you a lot,” he admits, smiling at Ashton when he gives him a questioning look. 

“Really?” he says, tilting his head. “You talk about me? What do you talk about?”

Calum looks down at his hands, threading his fingers together. “Just like... about your performances and your songs and your Instagram pictures,” he says, looking up at Ashton through his eyelashes, finding him beaming back at him.

“Oh, you like those?” he asks, his voice teasing.

Calum rolls his eyes fondly, “Yeah, I do.” 

Ashton just grins back, “That’s good to know,” he says, resting his chin on his hands again, looking right into Calum’s eyes. 

Calum can’t help but return his expression, the two sitting in silence for a moment. 

“Why Vapor?” He asks after a beat.

Ashton’s eyebrows lower on his forehead at the question, “Hmm?” he says.

“Why did you sing Vapor? On the radio show,” he asks again, placing his hand flat on the table between them. 

Ashton looks at his hand, his face morphing into something more thoughtful before he answers. “Well, like I said, it’s one of my favourite songs of yours, and it just kind of spoke to me, I don’t know,” he says slowly. 

Calum can’t help but pry, “How?”

Ashton laughs gently, “You should know, you wrote it!” he says accusingly. 

Calum holds his hand up in defence, “I like to hear what our songs mean to people! I love meeting my fans,” he says cheekily. 

Ashton rolls his eyes, “Oh, please,” he says, but he’s laughing, too. 

Calum waits a second for their laughter to die down, “Please, can you explain? I've always thought that song was really sad,” he says, his voice thoughtful. “But you made it something else.”

Ashton is silent as he takes in Calum’s comment, “I feel like it’s about someone yearning for someone,” he begins. “Like, they’re imagining all these things they want to do with this person, like printing their hands somewhere so they’re permanent and thinking that everything that person says is worth savouring, and that’s just beautiful,” he says, smiling softly. “We all want that don’t we?”

Calum sits, stunned. He’s heard people’s opinions on his music countless times before, but hearing it from Ashton has him floored. He’s breathless when he replies, “Yeah, of course we do.”

Ashton looks down at the table, his eyes tracing the pattern of the cloth, “And I can see that,” he says, looking up at Calum, his green eyes shining, “With you, I mean, maybe,” he says, his voice both confident but hesitant. 

Calum had just about caught his breath to have it knocked straight back out of him, “Wha— really?” he stutters out.

Ashton shrugs and laughs, “Yeah, I know we’ve just met for real, and I’m never usually this forward, but I feel like this was, I don’t know, that this was supposed to happen,” he says almost questioningly, his cheeks turning warm again. “Maybe I’m just an old romantic, but I feel really good about this, Calum, really good,” he says, bashfully looking between Calum’s shocked face and the lace detail of the table cloth. 

Calum ducks his head, trying to catch Ashton’s gaze, “Ash,” he says, the man in front of him lifting his head up. “Me too, I agree I mean, I feel it too,” he says, his smile mirroring Ashton’s growing one. “I’d love to see where this could go,” he says, his fingers inching closer to Ashton of their own accord. 

Ashton’s eyes catch the movement, bringing his own warm hand down to lay on top of Calum’s. 

“So let’s see,” Ashton says, his fingers moving gently over Calum’s hand, over the letters inked into his skin. 

Calum releases a breath and lifts his fingers, sliding them to fit perfectly in between Ashton’s own, letting Ashton’s words wash over him. The two share a hopeful smile.

“Let’s see.”


End file.
